Much Fruit

Hello Dear Friends…

I am honoring of all those today who have been persecuted in the name of our Savior! Polycarp was a brittle old man who loved Jesus and committed no crime!   Please persevere and remember those who have gone before us!  Continue to love, to honor, to walk in the footsteps of our Savior!  And I thank you all…from the bottom of my heart….for taking the time to read my blog! !

 

 

 

JESUS….to the church of Smyrna…

(Early Church tradition dates Revelation to the end of the emperor Domitian (reigned AD 81–96), and most modern scholars agree, although John may have written a first version after Nero’s Great Fire in Rome (AD 64) under Vespasian (AD 69–79) and updated it under Domitian A. D.)

 

Do not fear what you are about to suffer. Behold, the devil is about to throw some of you into prison, that you may be tested, and for ten days you will have tribulation. Be faithful unto death, and I will give you the crown of life.”

(Revelation 2:10 ESV)

 

Saint-Polycarp-1

 

Polycarp

…Bishop of Smyrna (A.D. 69-156) 

 

The most succulent fruit you did bear…as your name so well implies,

A believer from youth…until the day they took your life.

Really, how much faith did it take you to utter these words?

To your captors who held you prisoner and wish you to die?

……“But why do you delay? Come, do what you will!”……

This old man in his eighties, could not utter a sound,

Against His Master who died for him and promised a crown.

So loyal, so humble, just wanting to please …

He spoke a final prayer of thankfulness to be thought even worthy…

 To die a martyrs death, against this evil and wicked stance!

They ignite a great flame, to set your decrepit, old body ablaze,

Wishing first to bind you…to insure an even greater demise.

But to their utmost astonishment and serious wonder…

A sweet scent emits… of baked bread and fragrant spice…

…”Leave me as I am. For He who grants me to endure the fire will enable me also to remain on the pyre unmoved, without the security you desire from nails.”… 

They call for a dagger….a mighty weapon used to kill,

How dare this old man refuse to die by our murderous hands!

  Slaughter the one who stands mighty and untouched by flame…

Pierce him…and do not delay,

 For our hunger for this evil play is ever growing.

As they tear your flesh open….shattering tissue and bone

Your slaughtered blood extinguishes the fire that surrounds you…

 As you are savagely brought down…

Polycarp!!

 …your last breath is nearing, keep searching through the flame!

Grab a hold of your Master, and kiss the Feet of your Crown!!!

“Stand fast, therefore, in these things, and follow the example of the Lord, being firm and unchangeable in the faith, loving the brotherhood, and being attached to one another, joined together in the truth, exhibiting the meekness of the Lord ….”

(Polycarp… in his epistle to the Philippians A. D. 110-140)

Advertisements

One Single Yellow Rose

Dear Friends,

Thank you so much for the time you spend visiting my blog!!  My current blog is the result of the inspiration resulting from an empty and lonely Mother’s Day….As I always grieve the death of my own mother who died on October 16th, 1990 …and of the loving and honorable husband I was pray-fully blessed with… who never thought of disrespecting my mother… in ANY WAY!!…. and who honored her on her very last day here on Earth, at the young and tender age of 57,…

With One Single Yellow Rose

..…which he personally placed in her hands!!!  

Our faith in Jesus allows us to long for an eternity where we will be happily reunited with our loved ones in Christ!  Carry on my dear friends in Christ…..the world is full of evil, heartache, and strife….. but have no fear….. for He who lives within us has already conquered this fallen world!!!  

Thank you firstly…. to my blog friends who read my crazy and unprofessional writing even though I only attempt to honor Christ! ….secondly…to my everlasting and faithful husband Brian… who loved my mother so very unconditionally…and last, but certainly not least…. to Stacy…my beloved friend…who through beautiful conversation last night, provided me the inspiration to write this blog!!! 

Please continue to pray for those lost and searching for answers !

Your friend in Christ, 

Kathy 

 

 

 

 

rose 1

 

“The life of mortals’ is like grass, they flourish like a flower of the field;

The wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more.”

(Psalm 103: 15-16 NIV)

 

One single yellow rose…placed so lovingly in a deceased loved one’s last embrace…..

So very long ago….yet so brilliantly vivid in the ones’ who cherish the memory of that well- lived life left behind.

So soon to depart …and so painful to the ones who remain lingering here…

Free-falling in this sinful land where we,

Who steadfast believe…

And are just passing through to our God-given homeland!!

One single yellow rose…. Found intentionally along the path to that finite farewell….

And clouded in temporary heartache and loss.

A mourning daughter heavily sighs through tears, 

 Unsuspecting and unaware

Of the unconditional motive of the one who greatly respects…

That life once lived….

And, 

 Of the existing life that was brought forth

From her womb.

One single yellow rose…to beautifully represent a life renewed!

 Borne from the scattered and very few yellow roses…

which were handpicked and delivered to her deathbed vase.

 Handpicked… only from the garden she kept…

 Among the prickly weeds and thorns that grew there.

The few yellow roses which flourished just higher among the weeds…

and stood majestic on her doomsday nightstand.

  And the weeds unable to strangle…

The life growing there, 

 of the very last week of her earthly suffering.

 

 

rose 2

 

“Yet you sweep people away in the sleep of death—

They are like the new grass of the morning;

In the morning it springs up new;

But by evening, it is dry and withered.”

(Psalm 90: 5-6 NIV)

 

One single yellow rose….. Given from the young and vibrant hands of a son in law…

And freely into the now resting hands of a deceased mother in law.

Yet the wind continues to blow in this barren land…

And the evening light fades the vibrant color to only a dimmed black and white,

to those who continually choose to wander here….

But that single yellow rose… 

I know now,

Without any doubt, 

Lives eternally….

No East…

 No West…

Does it even know,

as our fallen world now dictates us all,

This beautiful flower survives,

in all immortal conditions!

Because His Kingdom rules over all ……

 

And that single yellow rose will survive the fall…..

 

His Kingdom will rule….

Forever…and ever!

Rain…..Fall On Me!

“So that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.”

(MATTHEW 5:45 ESV)

 

Summer Rain

 

This night is so very lonely…its never-ending fears begin to torment me….

The nightly doom sets in early on this very dark mid- night.

Wreaking havoc on my faith….

My soul…..

And my ever- present being….

My Lord…. And My Savior!

 “Hear my plea”…

“I will follow you…. Even if I walk all alone,”

“Till the break of day.”

This early daylight begins without a whispering sound….

The day’s morning sun is bright and blinding to my weary, sleepless eyes.

The low-lying and lingering ominous clouds seem to overshadow any lasting hope of this sunrise.

And yet… there You are…

Flickering….

Glowing….

 In the distance…

Like a candlelight ready to quickly extinguish ….

On this early morning daybreak…

My Lord…. And My Savior!…

 “Hear my plea”…

“I will follow you…. Even if I walk all alone,”

“Till the brink of night…..”

 

 

The seasons seem to change so quickly now….my breath is growing more swallow….

My body is diseased and weakened….by the years of my rebellious youth,

I so fear my own impending death…..

As I reach blindly into the aged darkness that surrounds me…

 Reaching only to grab hold of Your rod…

 And Your staff…

Yet I think I grab hold to…

 a bruised and nail-pierced Hand……

My Lord…. And My Savior!…

 “Hear my plea”…

“I will follow you…. Even if I walk all alone,”

“Till the verge of death…..”

 

I return as dust to the darkness I once called home….

Lying deep within the frozen ground

 Which once inhabited me.

And in this cold darkness…

I hear the distant sound of a magnificent horn.

I rise and look into this vast darkness….

And search desperately with weary, sleepless eyes

 Where Your constant light once flickered…..

My eyes grow clearer……

My vision as crisp as it once was…….

Am I awakening to a room in my Father’s house?

I scream out in utter fear……

Yet it is not my own shattering voice I hear…..

I hear another voice….

Speaking slowly,

Lovingly,

Is He welcoming me?……

“This is YOUR room in my Father’s house!!”

Though I do not deserve this upcoming wedding feast!….

I walk in,

 with my head held high!

Invited by the One who called me! 

My Lord…. And My Savior!…

 “Hear my plea”…

“I will follow you…. Even if I walk all alone,”

“Till the marriage supper of the Lamb.”

 

Rain

fall heavy on me in this present darkness…

For I fear no evil!

First Season Mourning Dove

“I said, oh, that I had the wings of a dove!  I would fly away and be at rest.”

(Psalm 55: 6 NIV)

 

mourning dove pic 1

 

Early morning on the first day of March, the cold rain is pouring down like sheets of melting ice in this messy transition of His miraculous seasons….

And my soul screams out to Him just like His seasons of everlasting change….

 

Fickle… yet faithful…

Discontent… yet satisfied…..

Cold…yet warm….

Doubtful….yet so very hopeful

Enemy….yet lover…

Depressed….yet eternally happy!

Alive… yet dying!!!! 

Pouring out my own tears of icy rain in my deepest dark sorrows of late wintertime…

Only to the One who listens to my ever-evolving yearly cries….

“Why do You leave me here?”

“In this dead winter barren,  a land of loss and suffering?”

I long for Your paradise

 

 

 In…..“Immanuel’s Land”

“Glory, glory in Immanuel’s Land!”

 

And……What a barren wasteland in this finite time…

it has truly become….

Of pain…and suffering…..

Of heartache and sure death!

I so try to love You always and stay faithful to Your Promises!

My unanswered questions just as many as Your long- awaited answers…

 I have yet to hear You speak…

I so desire to see Your face and kiss Your trampled, scorned feet!

But I will continue to walk blindly into this vast void of cold bitter darkness.

And in this freezing rain I fear will soon turn to freezing snow….

I glance out at Your wondrous creation and see my first season’s mourning dove…

I do not hear his mourning dove song….

As much as I try to listen, he stands silent in this freezing rain.

Sitting heroic and patiently …

Not even a ruffle of feathers does he flutter….

Perched high and mighty…

He is and always is!

Though I truly feel….

He is mocking me. 

Unfazed by the current condition of Your varied and wondrous seasons…

 Is he only there to remind me?

Of Your undying promises?

The promises You will keep!!!!

The promises you will keep to me, my Lord?

 

“Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you, He will never let the righteous be shaken.”

(Psalm 55: 22 NIV)

 

 

Yet we deny what He shows us…in our deepest sorrow!

Merry Christmas!

To all my WordPress friends….

Believers and Unbelievers alike….

Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays!!!!To all my unbelieving friends…

I write only for you!!!

And if you are suffering or in pain this season…so am I….

For this time of year is so very hard….so very difficult!

But I have a Belief in my heart….A belief you do not yet possess….

The trials and tribulations I share with you….. Shall one day pass…

And…. I will awaken in my Savior’s arms…….

Not because I am worthy to awaken there…

But only because I believe in His promise….His plan…..His salvation….

For I am unworthy, far more unworthy than you!

YET I BELIEVE….

I BELIEVED!!!!!!

Happy Holidays!  To you and your loved ones!!!

To my believing friends….

He who was willing to be born into poverty and lived a poor man’s life…

He who willingly went to the Cross and was crucified for us…only to give us eternal life…

A new hope….A new life….

He who loved us before the beginning of time.

He gave His all….

Do not ever forget or take for granted…. the free gift that has been given to us….

Merry Christmas! 

You can never truly enjoy Christmas until you can look up into the Father’s face and tell him you have received his Christmas gift.

John R. Rice  

 

Dedicated to my eldest granddaughter…. Madison! 

Who just celebrated her 7th birthday on December 6th…..

Merry Christmas Everyone!!! 

Familiar Adversaries

 

cabin trees 2

“For it will not be you speaking, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you. Brother will betray brother to death, and a father his child; children will rise against their parents and have them put to death.  You will be hated by everyone on account of My name, but the one who perseveres to the end will be saved.”

(Matthew 10: 20-22)

 

 

Before the first snowy morning dawn approached…a heartbroken prayer was gently and softly spoken…

 “Do not forsake me Lord, for I have warned others of the continuous works of evildoers….yet I fear I have lost the battle…”

And this battle waged was not fought on torrent enemy grounds…but in safe and familiar sanctuaries …..

By quite familiar and desperately loved faces.

Much adored ones but now turned foes…..Always embraced will be my present day adversaries…

 From the relaxed and easy surroundings of my past.

… They thought nothing to speak ill of me…

Their evil and vile language so unspeakable….so completely incomprehensible….

“I’m on my knees before You…..

I submit!”

“Where must I go from here Lord…

Do I concede to my once loved adversaries… or do I carry on without them?”

This is where this hard fought battle has found me….

 Among an open void filled with thorns and spikes

  A mighty wasteland it has now become, once vibrant and beaming with color.

I’m even more desperate to advance among the corn fields and forest You gave me…

 With the loving prince you once hand-picked.

 A ferocious warrior indeed who rescued this hurting daughter from afar…

And will always kept her safe and warm within.

I long to proceed to the winding and peaceful paths which clearly scream your Name,

 And abruptly awaken me from sleep….

…And bring me back to life once again.

Surely a hidden and heavenly blessing I have yet to fully realize…

For the poison also inhabits Your wondrous beauty which equally sustain us both .

cabin trees

“For son treats father contemptuously, daughter rises up against her mother, daughter in law against her mother in law; a man’s enemies are the men of his own household.”

(Micah 7:6)

 

 

“Sustain me Lord, please hear my plea this cold and bitter morning….

For my perseverance is severely lacking,

Please help me complete this long and hard life’s journey.”

Allow us both now to seek refuge in the forest you have given us…

For our twilight years are fast approaching.

 And the hard labor of years behind us… are scoffed and ridiculed…

they remain unnoticed…

By those who do not know You……..

Eternal Midsummer Sun

“For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”

(John 3:16) 

 

sunrise

 

I sit here very reluctantly with the imminent threat of storms looming overhead… yet still I eagerly await another early rising midsummer sun…. As the darkness continues to linger into daybreak… I am attempting rather unsuccessfully to embrace the predicted series of slowly moving storms which hastily interrupts my early midsummer morning. Late night storms have left my water starved annuals laying on their uprooted mangled sides… and a scattering of white and pink petals now lay across my parched wooden deck….. My sleepless night thoughts persist and I wander just too long in anticipation of the approaching storms… and my wandering mind only complicates the mix of emotions I’m experiencing from yet another one of life’s greatest disappointments….. Just another “failure” to add to my repertoire…but like too many failures in my already overstuffed life….this failure comes from within a deep and painful crevice of spiritually rooted connections and convictions with fellow believers….. Yet I feel a remarkable and undeniable familiarity to this type of great disappointment as I glance out my patio door staring blankly at the searing sheets of endless rain just beginning to pound the south facing side of my home…..

My thoughts take another turn to not only my own failures, but also to the multiple losses I have suffered throughout my life… Trapped within the walls of this sadly wandering state of mind…..  My thoughts turn to my sister.   I struggle to envision a much happier time where she stood firmly beside me… bravely fighting with her diseased and ravaged body in tow…. It was an extremely aggressive intruder which hastily interrupted her late winter morning sun many years ago…and many months before she finally succumbed to this ultimate life-robbing enemy…this sickening invader who eventually won the hard fought battle against her constant desire to remain here in this familiar yet darkened place….her final and seemingly unanswered plea to witness yet another one of her own early rising midsummer suns…..and in this frozen memory…. my heart sinks even lower.

With much regret….I think of the many disagreements my sister and I once shared….. Far too many of our own life’s experiences stood between the two of us and the One and Only Truth and our many experiences almost separated us from creating a final spiritual truce.  I being the lost prodigal child of a Great Comforter not too long ago and she being the ever faithful and everlasting daughter of a Mighty King… born in the faith and never wavering.  Sometimes this uncomfortable wedge created too wide a space for a compromise to even take hold…for a conversation to take place and grow…and to at last realize…… the simple understanding that our belief in the One and Only Truth did indeed take very different roads…. But both roads led back home!!   There are varied paths of Light that occur in this life’s constant darkness.   My road being twisted with many unwanted, and sometimes self-inflicted roadblocks… my footprints disappearing at long intervals of time upon its jagged edge and teetering on a lack of trust and commitment …her road well-traveled and worn with the unbroken trust of her steadfast feet.. Scattered were her footprints but never ever too close to its well-developed edge… yet narrow and unbending along the border…

 

road 1

 

The rain is tapering as the sound of thunder rumbles off into the distance as the storms move to the unsuspecting East…and my sadly wandering thoughts are slowly turning to the present-tense as I sense the departing storms and begin to plan my day…..yet I pause and attempt to envision my sister’s present day view of her eternal midsummer sun….so Majestic….so Gracious…and so very Merciful……but I cannot envision it for both the current and departing storms here cause too much turmoil……And there is yet another winding road for me to travel… but I know my simple belief in Him gets me through one more storm and one more jagged edge along its path…and I seek…and I plead… and I’m given comfort by Him once again… and by this simple truth…..

My faithful sister is the daughter of a Mighty King and I am the rebellious child of a Great Comforter!

 

pic of road 3

 

Take comfort in knowing He is there with you on your current winding road…..and there is nothing that can separate you from Him as long as you are a believer and you continue to simply believe in His promise!